In The
Sky of Dreaming
Prologue
The dream had been startling - and he lay in his bed for several
minutes while his sense of reality returned and the single
Blackbird song that filtered through the window of his cottage
became part of the late April Dawn Chorus.
He had dreamt he was standing among a circle of old Yew trees in
some graveyard while beside him the dark-haired woman he had just
kissed was transformed: into some-thing. She was still transforming
as he awoke, his duvet on the floor, his bedsheets dishevelled, his
nightshirt wet from sweat. She was beautiful - this young yet
middle-aged woman of indeterminate age whose red lips, whose
curvaceous buxom body, whose green eyes, had enticed him as he
stood, waiting; waiting, for something he felt he knew yet did not
quite know; something exciting, vivifying and yet also strange and,
perhaps, terrifying: some Being to take form and venture forth
again to Earth, released from alternate dimensions and the
alternate time which had enclosed it - and her - kin.
In the sky of dreaming: a gibbeous moon; and light from the Sun
which had set an hour or so before. And he could see clearly, and
quite strangely given it was night, the hillside beyond his circle
of trees as the hill of farmed fields descended down to a narrow
valley, while - beyond - the further rising hill was wooded except
at the very summit where jagged rocks protruded up from the gorse
and heather-covered earth.
There was a vague, uneasy, memory that clung to his dream-image of
that place - as if he had been there before, sometime in his
distant ancestral pagan past. So he lay there, in his bed in his
quiet old cottage in the country with only the sounds of the
singing birds outside to disturb the peace of rural England. Then,
slowly, tired from a night of broken and disturbed sleep, he got up
to stumble forward toward the mirror above the old porcelain sink
under the eaves, mindful as he almost always was of the
black-painted oak beam that cut across the room.
What he saw in the mirror shocked him, sending him stumbling back
toward his bed - until the back of his head hit the beam and he
fell. For he had seen the face, the greying hair, of an old man -
but he was still only twenty three.
Stumbling up, he looked again. It was no dream - he was an old man,
in face and body, his back bent from age; his joints aching; his
breathing laboured, his hands arthritic. He called, in his now old
raspy voice, to his parents in the room along the narrow corridor.
No reply - and so he called again, and again, until he shuffled,
slowly, from his room to find their room empty. Totally empty. No
furniture; no bed; no old oak wardrobes; no dark oak chest of
drawers underneath the small-paned window. Nothing - only the smell
of flowers, drifting up from the garden through the open
window.
Thus did he pass his day, slowly, perplexed, shuffling - from room
to room; from cottage to garden to outhouse to orchard and shed.
There was food, in the kitchen - bread and almost stale cheese -
and, as an old man unconcerned about his health, he ate them, as he
drank a bottle of fine wine from the house's cellar.
There was no telephone - no means of modern communication with the
outside world, as he, and his parents, had wished. Only books:
thousands upon thousands of books, in the bookcases that lined the
downstairs sitting room, the dining room, and hall, from floor to
ceiling, and which, in stacks, had inched their way up the winding
stairs that led to the four bedrooms, two of which were replete
with, and given over to, glass-fronted high cabinets containing his
father's prized antiquarian book. mineral, and manuscript
collection. He was in his father's study reading from the old
vellum manuscript that lay open on the large Oak desk beside a
large quartz tetrahedron:
"In truth, Baphomet –
honoured for millennia under different names – is an image of
our dark goddess and is depicted as a beautiful woman, seated, who
is naked for the waist upward. She holds in her left hand the
severed head of a man, and in her right a burning torch. She wears
a crown of flowers, as befits a Mistress of
Earth…"
It was not that he had forgotten about his missing parents - or the
emptiness of their rooms - for he had remembered they had died,
over fifty years ago, now. He had been briefly married, then, for
almost a year, with a newly born daughter. But they had died in the
nearby reservoir, her boat overturned. So so long ago that no
feelings now attached themselves to his memories, and - tired from
reading - he, an old aching arthritic man, ambled out onto the
veranda to sit in the worn Oak chair, to watch the Sun set behind
the old cider Orchard, as it always did at this time of year. So
many memories, so many that he drifted into sleep.
He awoke to find himself standing in his room, and although he had
for some reason he did not know grown accustomed to the strange
temporal peculiarities of his life, he was again surprised by his
reflexion in his bedroom mirror.
It was of a naked young woman - quite beautiful - whose green
eyes complemented the dark hair that framed her features and fell
down to her shoulders. Then, there were thoughts in his - in her -
head, and images, perplexing images of Life, strange life,
seething, seeding, growing, spreading forth from acausal
dimensions.
"I am you as you are me, " she - he - was saying, and he understood
without knowing why.
"You brought me back to life, here," she - he - intoned, like an
echo.
"How long has it been?" he asked.
"For you, only two of your days."
"It was the book, the crystal tetrahedron," he said.
"Yes!" she breathed out, and smiled. And he was forever gone from
the causal world he knew.
The body no longer ached from age. Instead, there was desire; a
strong, passionate, vibrant, youthful desire that needed to be
fulfilled. The body, as the face, was quite beautiful, well-formed,
and he was not surprised to find his - her - wardrobe full of
women's clothes. She selected an outfit appropriate to the dark
passion of her task and it was not long before she ventured forth
to feel the warmth of the Sun on her face. It was an exquisite
feeling, which she lingered for a moment to enjoy before her first
stalking began. And, when satiated - her need fulfilled - she
would, could, begin the task for which she had returned to Earth,
to the causal, restricting, dimensions of the so-slow-moving
limited beings born to die. She - ageless - had been this way
before in those forming times before The Sealing when such
Earth-bound beings were struggling to develope both speech and
thought, and she was, with her new human emotions, pleased to find
that such limited life, still, could be easily inhabited and
controlled. Thus would she, ageless, be joined by others of her
ageless shapeshifting kind.
So she walked across the old Orchard toward the lane that would
take her down the hill to a village of living people where she
might find someone, or many - some opfer - to provide her with the
causal energy she needed to keep her current shapeshifting
form.
0: Red Moon Dawning
There was little that he could do, for she had bound his wrists,
arms, and legs to the lattice frame that fenced one side of his
small unkempt back garden. It had been a pretty, English
cottage-garden, thirty years ago.
She had arrived that morning - early, as the Dawn of June broke
over his Farm below the wooded hill where oldly named fields and
scattered tumulii kept their waiting vigil. Arrived - to pound upon
the heavy old Oak door which he, solitary, taciturn, rudely opened,
gruffly saying "Yes!", disliking as he did unexpected,
expected, visitors and guests. Then: then, his memory after that
was confused, hazy, as if a dream-remembered fading with each
dwelling upon some moment, some segment, of it. Confused; hazy -
until he awoke to find himself in his back garden, lashed fast by
bailing-twine.
How, then, had she done this? For he was tall, stocky, strong -
even if nearing the sixtieth year of life - while she, strangely
beautiful, seemed to his memory but a slim young woman of little
obvious strength. Perhaps someone - or many - had helped her. But
there was no memory, only the reality of being there, waiting,
trussed, as a farm animal awaiting slaughter.
It was a long wait of hours that saw the hot Sun rise and the humid
air sweat and thirst him. The cows in the nearby fields - their
milking missed - were strangely quiet; his three Farm dogs absent.
So he - annoyed, attacked, by flies - waited, waited, silently
waited: for his prolonged yelling, profanities, curses, struggles,
had worn him down. She had not - no one had - arrived, been seen,
in answer. So he in the old worn working clothes he had fallen
asleep in, waited, waited, waited... until the setting Sun brought
a red moon dawning. The garden came alive then, briefly, scent
following scent - honeysuckle, primrose, night-scented stock -
bringing with his exhaustion a memory of life thirty years before
when his garden bloomed as it had bloomed in Summers when she his
wife lived as she, they, had happily lived before Death came to
claim her. Then, the brief memory - the too brief memory - gone, he
was alone, again, amid the silence.
Alone: until a slight almost lisping sibillation seemed to chorus
around him. No words, only a rushing as breeze among dry leaves.
Then, quite suddenly, she was there, before him, and he gasped as
if intoxicated by her presence, her scent, her beauty. A test, a
test, only a test of dreams, memories, life, desire. She was
offering him a choice - offering, without words, feelings or even
somehow without thought. The vision, the vista, the strange alien
life, was there - in him - as she looked at him, and faintly
smiled.
Then, he was free from the causal bonds that bound him, and he
momentarily staggered to fall to the dry dusty ground, to silently
cry out as she smiled before quickly moonlight-walking with her,
against his will, toward the summit of the hill. No signs, no
portents, came forth from the starry sky above, as nothing visible
would result when his earthly life has been drained away to leave
only the shell, only the empty shell, dust to interstellar dust,
cosmic atoms to cosmic atom to form, reform, be de-formed, cycle
after aeonic cycle.
No, nothing visible: to human eyes. But the cattle in the
fields; the Owl; the Farm dogs still cowering in a Barn, the
resting sleeping moving hunting hunted life around briefly stopped
to feel, to look around, as some-thing now unsealed ventured fastly
forth again toward the distant blue planet of Earth as the causal
energy she needed seeded itself within her causal female form,
bringing the temporary renewal desired.
1:
The Seeding
He knew the footpath well, even in the early morning Autumnal dark
which reached out to him as he climbed up toward the summit of that
wooded hill in rural England. There - tree roots reaching across
the worn path; there - the overhanging branch that in the Summer of
heavy foliage had been bent lower down to almost touch the broken,
now rotten, wooden fence post on his left whose stretching wire had
long been worn away by age, rain, frost, neglect. Here - the
protruding rocks which snaked down from where the harsh contours of
the old limestone Quarry above which had been softened naturally by
three decades of abandonment and Nature's resurgent growth.
So he walked steadily, as befitted his age, clothes, in the hours
before Dawn, used to the sound of nearby rustling - Deer, perhaps -
and the (for him) natural sound of a calling Owl. There was no
breeze, and no Moon on this mild mid-October night: but light
enough to see by, for eyes used to dark, and senses, body, attuned
to the natural being that was Nature. So he walked, as he had done
for five and more years from the village where he dwelled on the
flat land that bordered the hills and which as pasture continued
for miles until it met the sea. Walked - as always - alone: one
custom of his reclusive life - scorning any and every artificial
light, for he was, had become, almost like the life, the animals,
that lived, dwelled. in the almost forgotten woods. Wiry, lean, but
well-muscled and with long dark hair going grey which fell around
his bearded face lined with nearly three score years of life and
three decades of outdoor manual toil which had left his right wrist
and hand rheumatic and his lungs a little worse for wear given the
long hours spent toiling on dank, rainy, misty, foggy, cold and
frosty days.
He did not now even mind the failing vitality of his life, the
pains of age, for she - his wife, companion - died five Summers and
a Spring ago, and he had grown used to his life alone. The nightly
early walks; the work on a neighbours farm; the evening meal where
he sat in his chair by the fire drinking glass after glass of Port
until tiredness overcome him and he slept, fitfully and for a
while. No, he did not mind, not any more - for there was recompense
enough in the shrouding, shielding dark; in being-with the life
around, in, of the woods, the hills, the very earth, which life he
felt as he felt his breath drawn in on a cold and frosty cloud-free
Dawn when he would, did, stand - had stood - on that hill's summit
clear of trees, that hill's summit a valley, a wood and two paths
distant, from where he could see the distant sea and the Sun as it
rose bringing a soft joy that seeped into his very bones and a
feeling, a feeling, of no longer being alone.
It was as if he belonged there, now - there, on that summit where
the old ancient human circles of earth fortifications and trenches
of thousands of years ago had been breached, reduced, covered, by
the process of Nature's natural change.
He was not surprised to see her, there on the summit - standing on
the raised mound of broken grass-covered rocks that marked the
almost-centre of the not-quite-round upper fortifications. Standing
there, as the dark grey of nearly Dawn gave way to the lighter grey
that marked the cloud-obscured rising of another Autumnal Sun. She
was dressed in green, as he was; but his olive green seemed drab
beside her verdant richness, and as he slowly walked the last
twenty upward yards toward her, the rising gentle breeze gently
raised the ends of her auburn hair. She turned toward him then, and
smiled.
No, he was not surprised to see her, standing, smiling: for she was
his dream of the previous night; a woman, beautiful, mature yet of
indeterminate age, whose green sapphire necklace both emphasized
her green eyes and the tanned skin of her neck and shoulders. Not
surprised to see her in that long verdant flowing dress that
emphasized her well-proportioned voluptuous body.
But he was startled - momentarily shocked - when she came forward
and touched him. He felt the warmth of her hand on his face; felt
her soft fingers caress the dry roughness of his cheek. Felt the
warmth, the scent, of her breath as she leant her face close to
his, and all he could do was stand totally still with a palpitating
heart and look into the cosmos of her eyes.
There was no need for words, he knew: for she was his thought and,
in that dark numinous moment, the very thread by which he clung to
life. She had been waiting for him - waiting for one like him to
venture forth close to those sinister pathways where she and her
kind waited, dwelling, long century after long century, thousand
year after thousand year until almost two Aeons had passed. So he
felt and so he knew, beyond words and a rational understanding, and
she kissed him then, as a lover might, draining away from him the
pains of his age and becoming for him, in him, that warmth of
languid repose felt when two lovers, tired, sweaty, sleep together
naked body entwined with naked body.
He was not to know, then - as she caressed him and bared her
nakedness for him to touch and feel and kiss and enter - that she
needed his seed to bring forth into the world a new kind of life.
But had he known, then, he would not have cared. So he let his
passion, his need, guide him, until he, she, spasmed in ecstasy as
the warm Sun rose higher to warm the human world that dwelt upon,
around, the land below that old and sacred hill while They,
waiting, were watching as they waited and watched, almost formless
in those formless acausal spaces where they dwelt. Waited, waiting,
for their bodies as she had waited for hers.
He lay with her, naked body upon naked body, for what seemed to him
a long time as part of her seeped into him bringing without words
an understanding of what he must do and why. She was offering him a
choice, a genuine choice, and he was free to rise and dress himself
and walk away even as some-thing, some kind of life, was seeding
itself in the womb of her human body.
His choice was to stay; to do as she - as They - desired, and his
first willing task would be to seek out and find some women of
child-bearing age and bring them to this place so that others might
seep through the ever-opening nexion to inhabit their bodies and to
breed from them the new species They needed. Thus would he use
those acausal seeds that she, in and through and after their
joining, had planted in him - talents, skills, and magick: to
entice, entrap, beguile, bewitch, ensnare. And thus would he,
alive, be rewarded - with her warmth, her touch, her kiss, her
body.
2: Zarid, The Pretender
Zarid's day began - as it usually did - with his Russian partner
bringing him a cup of black coffee while he lingered and languished
in his bed in the stuffy attic room of their house where he slept,
surrounded by books and discarded clothes. Years ago Zarid had
retreated at night to this room, his lair, to leave his common-law
wife to sleep with their child in their room on the first floor of
the large Edwardian house, and this retreat had become his habit,
his routine, for he valued his privacy and his time, his priority
his work at the nearby University, his obsession with seducing
young women and his own secret submissive desires.
That morning of the damp overcast November day, he was tired, but
aroused by the dream of his night, and, naked, he slunk down the
steep winding stairs that led to the first floor and the bedroom of
his wife. She was there - attractive, blonde-haired - dressing, and
turned to look at him as he entered but he wasted no time on
endearments and pleasantries but instead caressed her breasts
before telling her of his desire.
She was used to his ways, her early romantic love having given way
to the strange practicalities of their strange shared life, and she
wearily followed him into their large bathroom where he lay, on the
tiled floor, waiting. She did not disappoint, and, squatting over
him, urinated on his body and face while he took his own selfish
pleasure with his hand. Satiated, he showered and obsessively
groomed himself while she attended to the many tasks of her day,
and it was not long before he, dressed in his usual ensemble of
long black leather jacket, black shoes, grey shirt and dark
trousers, departed to walk the mile to his University office,
knowing that she, his companion of five years, would assuredly
clean the bathroom. He kept promising to marry her, as she, and
part of him, desired, for then his little lie of years ago to the
University authorities, to others (and sometimes even to himself)
would no longer lie in wait to trap him.
He was a tall man, merging seamlessly into his middle-thirties,
whose hair - to his chagrin - has begun to thin and recede, and
whose body already bore the marks of his life and occupation:
stooped shoulders, from hours hunched over books, and a pale
complexion occasioned by his indoor existence. He did not care
that, until recently, his place of work had been a Polytechnic in a
northern industrial city - for he had achieved his dream of being a
Professor, a dream nurtured by his boyhood desire to escape from
what he felt was the cloying, enclosed, dreary, mundane, banal,
dead-end world of the old terraced streets of Leeds where his
family had lived for generations and pursued their occupation as
tailors, and which he left aged eighteen, never to return. So he
was proud of his success, if not of his first name - a choice of
his mother's in honour of her immigrant grandfather from the
Ukraine - and eager, this morning of threatened rain, to seat
himself at his cluttered untidy desk and compose his forthcoming
lecture. Then, that task over, the Professor of Philosophy who
taught ethics would gleefully plan another secret assignation with
another of his female students.
It was not to be however, for, awaiting him in his modest somewhat
cramped office in a rather anonymous modern building, were two
unsmiling conservatively dressed middle-aged men in dark suits, one
of whom introduced himself as a Detective Sargent named Malloy. As
they sat opposite him, Zarid - in his rather more comfortable chair
- nervously played with his fountain pen.
"We believe you know this woman," Malloy said, without preamble,
showing him a photograph.
Yes, he did - but he held the photograph for a long time before
saying, "She does seem familiar. I can't seem to place her, at the
moment."
"Sandra Letton. She was a student here."
Zarid pretended to peer at the photograph again. "Ah yes. How can I
help?" He smiled, rather unconvincingly.
"She went missing several weeks ago."
"Last I heard, " Zarid said, "she'd moved to work in Cheltenham.
Some sort of Civil Service job, I think."
The two men look at each other knowingly before Malloy said, "We
understand you had a relationship with her." It was not a
question.
Zarid's face went a greyer shade of grey. "That was a while ago,
now. Just a brief, casual thing."
"Indeed, so you say," Malloy replied, in a tone Zarid found both
intimidating and disapproving.
"I haven't heard from her in a long time," Zarid lied, then
instantly regretted saying it.
The two men betrayed no emotion. "Well," Malloy said, standing up,
"if you do hear from her, we'd appreciate it if you would contact
us," and handed him his card.
"Yes, yes, of course," Zarid replied, his hand shaking as he took
it.
"Your public lecture next week," Malloy's hitherto silent companion
said, in a cultured accent, as he and Malloy stood at the door.
"Very interesting and pertinent topic."
"How did you know about that?" Zarid asked.
But the man only smiled, and then they were gone, from his office,
as a mixture of conflicting emotions assailed Zarid. The glass of
dry Madeira he poured for himself - from the small cabinet beside
his desk - calmed him, a little, and he opened his notebook
computer to read again her e-mail, received the evening before.
"Hi Zarid, how you doin? I bet
you've kept those photos, haven't you, you naughty boy! It would be
great to meet up asap, have a drink (or three!) and chat and maybe
- something else, like old times! I'm in your area again for a
while. By the way, I've got a wicked story to tell you about a
friend of yours. Call me on......."
Without thinking, Zarid dialled the mobile telephone number.
"Sandra?" he asked in reply to the "Hello?"
"Yes?"
"Zarid."
"Hi! Can you meet me?"
"Yes, yes, of course!" he said, remembering their many trysts and
her sexy body.
She gave a place, not far, and a time - that evening - and he,
after that quick call which she quickly terminated for some reason
he did not dwell on, spent the day caught between turmoil,
expectation, excitement, and a wordless feeling of unease which he
tried, unsuccessfully, to dissipate by concentrating on his work.
He wrote a few pages of his lecture, gave up, stood for a long
while blankly staring out of his office window, and then sat,
disinterested, through a tutorial with one of his students, before
leaving the campus to wander into the centre of the city, unaware
of the two men discreetly, and professionally, following him.
So he wiled away the late morning and the afternoon hours of that
damp overcast November day dallying in various cafés, often
taking from the inside pocket of his jacket one of the notebooks he
always carried to record his musings and his thoughts, occasionally
scribbling away, with his fountain pen, immersed in his worlds of
philosophy and sexual fantasy, and smiling once - several times -
as he remembered how Sandra had pleased him and how she had allowed
him to wear her damp panties, and the suspenders he had bought
her.
Then, in the descended darkness of that busy city, he wandered
forth to be down by the river where no trees shadowed the footpath
by a built-on ancient meadow and the wide railway bridge funnelled
a noisey train. He was there, approaching the chosen spot at the
chosen time, and saw her, in that diffuse glow sent forth from
sodium city lights, waiting. She smiled in greeting, as he did, and
he was within three feet of her forming words of humorous welcome
when she unexpectedly and slowly tumbled forward.
He caught her, as she fell, but she was already dead, her warm
blood staining his hand.
For a minute, and more, Zarid held her, not knowing what to do in
the emotional and physical numbness that enveloped him. Then, he
was aware of someone standing over him as he knelt still cradling
her dead body; aware of others, nearby. They - everything - seemed
to him to be moving slowly. Blue flashing lights; distant voices.
"Single shot...back of head..." Then another nearer voice, which
suddenly intruded upon him.
"Let's get you out of here. You're in serious trouble..."
Zarid recognized the speaker. It was DS Malloy.
3:
Consequences
He disliked milky sugared tea, but Zarid drank it nevertheless -
his third cup that morning - as he waited, shivering, in the warm
brightly-lit, windowless, small and rather clinical interview room
of his local Police Station. Waited, still dressed in the white
forensic coverall given to him the previous evening, after his own
clothes had been taken and before he was locked in a cell whose
stark light was constant. Waited, as he had waited all of the
evening and many hours of that night, awake, alone. Awake, alone -
except for a startling dream during one short period of fitful
sleep. He had dreamed that a beautiful woman was in the cell with
him. She was chanting some name which he could not quite hear, and
smiling at him, exuding a warmth that he could feel, physically
feel; gesturing for him to come toward her, and he was about to do
so when the cell door opened, returning him to a cold, severe,
reality.
Thus was he waiting, again, for some questions; for answers, and
thus did he sit that morning waiting for one of the two men
opposite him to say something, anything. They just sat there, their
arms folded, looking at him as they had looked at him earlier the
previous day in his office; sat there, watching, until Malloy -
slowly, with a practised ease - took from the folder in front of
him several photographs, laying them neatly out on the utilitarian
table.
Zarid knew then that they, or someone, someone from the Police, had
been to his house.
"Did you know she was pregnant?" Malloy suddenly said.
"No, no I didn't."
"Is that why you killed her?"
"This is ridiculous!" Zarid said.
"Is it? You lied about not having been in contact with her..."
"I can explain."
"I'm sure you can. Just what information did she pass onto
you?"
"Information? What information?"
"You knew she worked at GCHQ, didn't you?"
"Where?"
"Don't play games. We found this letter, from her, in your
house." From the folder Malloy produced a three page
wordprocessed letter.
Zarid glanced at it. It was addressed 'My Dear Naughty Boy!' and
signed, by hand in lilac-coloured ink, 'With love and kisses,
Sandra.'
"I've never seen it before."
"So you say. She goes into some detail about her work. Classified,
government work."
"Like I said, I've never seen it before."
"The evidence against you is piling up."
"Look," Zarid said, afraid and rather annoyed at the same time,
"I'd like to see a Solicitor. I'm entitled to, right?"
"Under normal circumstances, yes. These are not normal
circumstances."
"But - "
"Aiding and abetting someone who has supplied you with classified
information is a serious offence," Malloy said. "Then there is the
matter of your affairs with your students - an impressive record,
which would come out during a trial. The matter of lying to us. The
images we found on your computer. The drugs found at your home and
in your office. The fact that your Russian partner doesn't appear
to have a valid residence permit. And so on."
"I get the picture."
"But we're prepared," Malloy continued, unsmiling, and collecting
the photographs and letter together, to place them back in the
folder, "to forget about all these things, if you'll agree to help
us."
"Me? Help? How? So you know I didn't kill her?"
"We're working on that assumption."
Relieved, Zarid eagerly asked, "How can I help?"
"We know she went to see a friend of yours, last week."
"Yes?"
"A certain Esmund Yaxley."
"I didn't know they knew each other," said Zarid, with genuine
surprise.
"Whatever. But you know his reputation, his past, his
activities."
"Yes, yes, of course. But - I've nothing to do with that."
"We know. But we'd like you to go see him, and find out what he
knows."
"About Sandra?"
"Yes."
"See him, when?"
"The matter is urgent; a question of national security; so
today."
From the briefcase which had been beside his chair on the floor,
Malloy's silent companion produced a new, boxed, mobile telephone,
two large bundles of twenty pound notes, and two official-looking
forms.
Malloy pushed the money over to Zarid. "Expenses. We'll need you to
sign this receipt, for the money, and this document, which you
should read first."
Zarid read, and signed, as he was told.
"We will arrange transport to take you to the Station."
"But my work; tutorials..."
"All taken care of. A leave of absence has been arranged. And we've
brought a few clothes from your house."
"My wife..."
"I'm sure you can think of something!" For the first time that day,
Malloy smiled. "From now on, " he continued, as his companion
returned the signed receipt and signed document to his case,
"you'll be in contact with Malin, here."
"My contact number," Malin said, "is already stored in the
telephone, which is connected, with the battery fully
charged. I shall expect to hear from you this evening."
4: Nexions
The warmish Sun of mid morning caught Zarid as, carrying a small
travel bag, he walked the short distance down to the Railway
Station entrance from where the anonymous car, and driver, had
deposited him. He was glad of the Sun, of his freedom, and lingered
by the entrance for a while. Then, ticket bought with a little of
the given cash, he joined the throng heading for the busy
platforms. Once, he thought he saw the woman of his dream the
previous night, and rushed toward her - but he was mistaken, and
was left, feeling rather foolish, to wait as the others waited for
the southbound train.
Esmund Yaxley. Why was he not surprised he might be somehow
involved? The train arrived, on-time, and he was glad to sit within
its warmth, to try to give some meaning, some semblance of meaning,
to the rapid unsettling unforeseen events of the last two days. The
warmth, the slight swaying motion and slight constant almost
rhythmic noise of the train, his own tiredness, combined to relax
him, a little, and once - to his surprise - he found himself
overcome with sadness and a certain grief at Sandra's death.
A single tear: then, unsettling questions to which he had no
answers assailed him, and slowly - as fair-weather cumulus clouds
pass slowly below the blue-sky of a languid almost breezeless
English Summer day - he understood his situation.
He had been, was being, manipulated, and maybe - just maybe - his
old friend Esmund could provide him with some answers. Esmund; the
wiry but bearded and fit and well-muscled Esmund who had spent the last
decade since their time together at University flitting from one
place, to another, from one adventure to another, always seeking
something that seemed - at least to Zarid - forever beyond his
reach, and acquiring along the way a somewhat sinister reputation,
aided by three spells in prison, for violence, association with a
variety of disreputable and sometimes criminal characters, and his
interest in, and knowledge of, the Occult.
But, soon, physically and emotionally tired, Zarid was briefly
asleep, dreaming of that beautiful woman again.
"What brings you here?" Esmund said, jovially. He was sitting on a
bench in his well-tended cottage garden in the beginning twilight
of what had been a warmish day.
"Just wanted to get away for a few days. Domestic things, you
know."
"Is that so?" And Esmund looked at him quizzically.
Zarid sighed. "No, not really. Have you heard? About Sandra?" He
sat down on the bench, tired from the exertion. It had been a long
journey, involving several changes of train, and a taxi from the
market town on the edge of the Costwolds to the small village where
Esmund's small cottage lay, up a track inaccessible to motorized
vehicles and near the top of a wooded hill. Esmund's Border Collie
dog had eyed him suspiciously as Zarid had opened the somewhat
rickety wooden gate, then decided not to bark and returned to his
slumber by the Cherry tree.
"Yes, there was a brief report, on the news."
"I was there, when she died. She came to see me."
"She said she might," Esmund said.
"So you did know her then?"
"Yes."
"And that she was pregnant?"
"Would you like some tea? I have Keemun, and some rather nice
Chinese Sencha. Or there is Darjeeling, of course."
"I was thinking of something a little stronger."
"Coffee it is then. Ethiopian, or Kenyan? Come on in." Esmund led
him into the small, recently refurbished and very tidy kitchen.
"Espresso, Americano, Cappuccino?" he asked.
"You're joking."
"No. One of life's many little civilized pleasures," and Esmund
pointed to his one-group espresso machine.
As darkness descended, they drunk their coffee, black, in silence -
seated in comfortable armchairs before the bright warming log-fire
of the cottage sitting-room - until Zarid said, "You seem quite
comfortable and settled, here."
"Surprised?"
"Yes. Is this place yours?"
"Yes, and no. Belongs to a lady friend of mine."
"It figures!"
"So, about Sandra. What do you want to know?"
"Did you know that she was pregnant?"
"Yes."
"By you?"
Esmund smiled. An enigmatic smile. "Would you like to meet her,
this lady friend of mine?"
"Possibly. I don't know. Did you know about Sandra's work?"
"Of course. She made no secret of it. She was very helpful, to us,"
and he looked at Zarid in that penetrating way he had.
"Us? Not one of your Occult groups?"
"Not really. Beyond all that mundane passé stuff. You really
should meet her, you know."
"Who?"
"She wants to meet you. In fact, I've invited her here this
evening. You'll be staying here, for at least tonight, I
presume?"
"If that's OK with you."
"Certainmont! The guest
room is ready. Shall I show you, then you can refresh up while I
prepare us some dinner? Nothing special, just some Trout I
liberated from a stream down the hill."
The guest room of low-ceilinged beams was small, with small
windows, as befitted the small old cottage of thick walls, but it
was - or seemed to Zarid to be - immaculately and tastefully
furnished. There were crystal decanters, of Port and Sherry, on a
small table by an armchair near the small fireplace where a fire of
coalite burned, spreading a warming glow and a restful warmth.
"Help yourself to an aperitif," Esmund said. "There's a jug, and
basin, for a wash." And he indicated the old marble-topped stand in
one darkened corner.
"Thank you," Zarid said, and meant it, surprised by the
hospitality.
"Oh, and if you need a light to see by, there are some candles, in
holders, there. I much prefer candlelight, don't you," Esmund said,
and smiled.
Then Zarid was alone, amid the country silence, and he took
advantage of Esmund's absence to try his newly acquired mobile
telephone, surprised to find there was signal strength enough for
him to make a call.
The meal of whole baked Trout, with lemon and parsley butter and
fresh vegetables, over, they settled with their glasses of vintage
Port by the fire in the candle-lit sitting room.
"This is all very civilized," Zarid jovially said.
"What did you expect?"
"Well - "
"Don't answer that!"
"Really, I would have visited you sooner, if I'd known."
"You are here now."
"Yes." Zarid felt very tired, almost exhausted, and he briefly
closed his eyes before the exotic sensual scent brought him back
from the verge of sleep.
She was there - the woman of his dream of the night before -
standing beside Esmund who held her hand. She wore a green sapphire
necklace and a long verdant flowing dress that emphasized her
well-proportioned voluptuous body, and Zarid felt her warmth
seeping out to touch him.
But something - some fear once deeply hidden, some nameless dread,
something from his own ancestral past, and perhaps also some small
knowing of his betrayal of his friend - overwhelmed him in the
instant of that sensuous breeching searching touch so that he,
gasping, screaming - while Esmund laughed - rose to stumble
backward to lurch toward and out from the door to run down the
path, falling, scampering over the gate, arms flaying, to the track
and the road nearly a mile below where a single street light
reminded him to pause and think and seek the best way homeward.
In his head: visions and vistas and words and sounds and laughter.
She had touched him, if only for an instant, and all the answers he
came to seek, he was sent to seek, he knew, along with many answers
to questions he wished he did not know.
5:
Homeward
Zarid could not sleep, nor relax, on the even longer journey back
to his home. Twice - three times, more - he fumbled with his mobile
telephone, and twice, three times - more - he did not call his
contact as part of him desired. Would would he say? What could he
say? The whole matter was beyond belief - unbelievable - and the
more he thought about it, the more he became convinced no one,
least of all Malloy and Malin, would believe him.
So he spent many hours of that tedious journey through the dark of
night striving to concoct some convincing story that he might tell.
One version had him denying everything; another - that Esmund and
Sandra were simply lovers. Or that she was some Priestess, a
Mistress of Earth, even, in one of Esmund's many sinister covens.
Or that Esmund was going to sell the information Sandra had
provided to one of his criminal contacts. But who, then, killed
her, and why? The sad, even tragic, thing was that he did know, and
this knowledge placed him in danger.
It was in the taxi - well beyond the hour of midnight - on the
journey from the Railway Station to his home that he believed he
had found a suitable deceptive answer. He would telephone Malin
tomorrow, and pleased with himself, he finally began to feel a
little relieved. It did not last, for, inside his house, there was
no wife waiting to greet him, no child asleep for him to briefly
watch, as he often did, before he ascended the stairs to his
private eyrie - only Malloy and Malin and two armed Policemen.
"Where are they?" he anxiously asked as he tried to trawl his house
before being restrained by Malloy.
"We've taken them into protective custody."
"Why?" he somewhat stupidly asked.
"You found what we wanted, haven't you?" Malin asked him.
"No. I don't know." He felt intimidated, and his resolve to lie
began to weaken. He might - probably had been - followed to
Esmund's cottage, as they - Malloy and Malin and those who
controlled them - might, and probably already did, know the
answers, or at least some of them. Why else had they taken his
family into protective custody? Or was that itself a ruse,
pressure, blackmail, a means to get him to talk? He was beginning
to become confused, for his mind again became suffused with visions
and vistas and words and sounds and laughter, for she - some alien
being - had touched him.
"Can I see my wife?" he asked, trying to calm himself.
"Later, " Malin said, harshly.
You do realize, don't you, Zarid," Malloy interjected, softly,
"that this is a matter of national security?"
"Possibly; yes."
"Therefore, surely your duty is to tell us everything that
occurred, everything that you learnt."
"Here?"
"No."
So he was taken back to the Police Station where he sat, with
another cup of sickly sweet milky tea in another interview room,
with Malloy, Malin and another, older, well-dressed and
unidentified man who stood by himself in a corner of that room.
"This interview will be recorded," Malloy said, somewhat
unnecessarily, as he turned the machine on.
Zarid began, slowly, hesitatingly, telling of Esmund's admission of
knowing that Sandra was pregnant; of him receiving information from
her; but it was when he spoke of the women - recalling her - that
his slow hesitation ceased, and the words flowed fastly, fluidly,
from him as if he was being guided, for his mind became suffused
again with visions and vistas and words and alien sounds.
"She who touched me is not quite
human, you see, as Sandra's child was not, which I'm sure you
already knew. They have this plan, you see, to breed a new not
quite human species, half human, half alien. She - They, these
shapeshifters - need human bodies, at least to begin with. They
want to live again, to dwell, again, on Earth: to have form and to
cease to be formless. To live, to feel, to love. To guide. Thus,
They came back and They will come back, dwelling in human bodies.
They need humans to begin with at least like I said as they believe
humans need Them. To evolve, together, a symbiosis. That is the
key. Symbiosis. They were here thousands upon thousands of years
ago, at the dawning of our consciousness, but They were then unable
to complete their work, for there were The Others, who opposed
Them, and who opposed her - the prime nexion, The Beginning - and
who did their own dark work, botched experiments, botched changing,
and whose botched living experiments stayed. They got it wrong, you
see, The Others; wrong - for they produced a strange, vindictive
and twisted and unstable and mutant brood who survived on Earth by
their mendacity and ruthless cunning and who made keeping their
mutated blood pure into some kind of religion.
"Those humans were genetically-modified by these Others, the evil
ones, and their mutant descendants are among us now, manipulating,
controlling, planning. Slowly, they have planned, with their
ruthless cunning, with the inbred slyness they possess, and over
the last hundred years - especially the last seventy years - they,
or their agents, have seized clandestine control of our
governments, here in Britain, in America, using the power of money,
of the Media - which are both under their control - and using the
myths, the ideas, they have invented, to control humans, to
manipulate humans not of their own kind. The first stage of their
plan is for a world government of control, and that is nearing
completion.
"To this end they engineered wars, and get some people or, mostly,
their own agents among humans to do vile things just so they can
get governments to react to them and introduce more laws, more
measures of control, more repression, more tyranny, and all in the
double-speak name of "freedom and democracy", the false idols which
their servants and their lackeys worship and obey, but which the
mutants don't. But they have found willing and brutal allies
in many lands - particularly in America. They - or their
agents and allies - persecute, and torture, and hound, or revile,
or discredit, or kill, or imprison on some pretext or other, anyone
who knows their plans or who sees them for what they are. That is,
they now have the power, the influence to destroy anyone, any
person, any group, any country, they want to - to get them out of
the way.
But She - They, her shapeshifters from the acausal - want humans to
be genuinely free, as evolved individuals; so She has come back as
They will come back to liberate humans from those, The Others, the
evil ones, and their mutant servants, so that humans might evolve
and take their destined place among the stars and particularly
among the acausal dimensions. The mutant, materialistic,
causally-tied spawn of The Others, you see, have forgotten their
origins, lost their true past, do not know who manufactured them,
changed, them, made them what they were and are, but they do
fanatically believe they are chosen, that it is they who should,
who must, who have been chosen to, rule this world and its peoples,
whatever the human cost and the misery they cause. They really are
the spawn of evil; agents of evil - and She and her siblings will
stop these bastard descendants of The Others who cannot ever reach
out to, or travel among, or exist in, the timeless blissful
beautiful realms of the acausal. But humans can - and can eternally
exist there, in the acausal when the new symbiosis is
complete."
He was finished, exhausted, himself again, and saw Malloy looking at
Malin with
a look of disbelief.
"I see," Malloy said, annoyed, before stopping the recording.
"You don't believe me - all that - do you?" Zarin quietly said, uneasy
and perplexed.
"Frankly, I'd have thought an intelligent man like you would have
come up with a better story than crap and fantasy like that."
Turning to the unidentified man he said, "We're finished here, I
think?"
The man nodded, and left the room.
"You disappoint me, you really do," Malloy said to Zarid.
Zarid was taken to a cell, where he waited, nervously, for
something to happen. For what seemed like hours, nothing did, and
he gradually succumbed to his exhaustion, to dream of the beautiful
woman. She was speaking to him without words and he felt her moving
closer, closer to him until he smelt again her quixotic perfume -
but the dream, the beautiful vision, was snatched away from him as
two men entered his cell to bind his arms behind his back and tie a
dark hood over his head.
He tried to struggle, but the injection he was given soon took
effect and he was taken through the corridors of a curiously
deserted and darkened Police Station to a waiting van.
"Nothing happened here," Malin said to Malloy as, outside in the
cold night air, they watched the van being driven away.
"Your people checked the foetus, I take it?" Malloy asked.
"Perfectly normal," Malin lied.
Esmund knew he was under surveillance, and the reason why - even
before Zarid's arrival - and his years of experience of living on
and often beyond the fringes of the law had made him prepared for
most eventualities. So, from behind the false wall in the cellar of
his cottage, he collected the items he considered he might need to
evade and escape from those watching him so that he might keep the
rendezvous with Raynould on that ancient hill circle where she,
their dark goddess, had first touched Raynould and where in the
coming hours of darkness she would give birth to his half-human
child. For a few seconds, Esmund felt a little jealous of the man
he had never met, but he calculatingly placed that human emotion
aside.
He selected a variety of weapons - his favoured long-barrelled
revolver with hand-loaded rounds; a handy pump-action shotgun; a
grenade or two - and a passport, and driving license, for a new
identity as well as a small rucksack containing a variety of
clothes, bottled water, and toiletry items. Then, as the bright Sun
of that early morning rose into the clear sky that had brought the
nightly frost, he - revolver in hand, shotgun slung over his
shoulder, rucksack on his back - sauntered casually out into the
garden, followed by his dog.
"Stay!" he said, and his canine friend obeyed. There would, Esmund
knew, be a woman, a lover from the village below, to care for his
dog, for however long he was away.
Scorning the path, Esmund vaulted over the fence into the steeply
sloping grazing field that adjoined the eastern side of his garden
and began to run up, and right at an angle, toward the summit of
his hill. There was no cover there for those who might follow him
from below, and he had run almost two hundred yards when he saw
them begin their delayed pursuit. He had assumed there would be
others, covering the summit and the descent from the hill, and he
was correct, for he had almost reached to tall centuries-old
spreading Ash that grew beside the old summit pathway when he saw
two armed Policemen who moved to block his way.
"Armed Police!" one of them shouted, raising his weapon. "Stop!
Armed Police!"
Esmund did not stop. Instead, he dropped down, took aim and quickly
fired three rounds from his revolver. The bullets hit their targets
and he rose to run forward. One of his opponents was dead, shot in
the forehead, but the other, only lying injured, was struggling to
raise his weapon just as Esmund reached him. Esmund pointed his
revolver at the man's head saying, "Sorry mate, nothing personal,"
before taking the man's holstered Glock pistol and his HK MP5
submachine gun and side-stepping to turn and fire at the armed
plainclothes Police Officers still running up the hill toward him.
He shot one in the leg before moving sharp left and sprinting
toward the woods that covered part of the western side of the
hill.
The woods gave him the opportunity he needed - for he knew them
well - and he zigzagged down, through the trees, stopping once to
stand and listen. He heard shouts, above, and the sound of someone,
or two, noisily moving through the leaf-litter and breaking small
fallen twigs. There would be Police dogs, and a helicopter, and
more men, he knew - but not now; not for a while. So he made it to
his first destination without being seen: a path beside a stream to
take him to where a vehicle waited, left for just such a time as
this, hidden in a rented barn.
It did not take him long, in the old inconspicuous Land Rover, to
reach the junction where the narrow rutted pot-holed tarmaced lane
that for nearly two miles had weaved between fields of pasture gave
way to a minor road, and he turned westerly, driving until he found
a place suitable enough to stop. It was a wide gated field
entrance, and he parked to begin his change of identity. It took
him longer than he remembered to trim his beard with scissors and
then completely shave it off, but - pleased with the results - he
changed his shirt, and jacket, and, with a tweed cap upon his head,
his weapons out of sight, the transformation was complete.
No one stopped him as he travelled South, and he became just one
driver in one of the multitude of vehicles that thronged the roads
of England.
6:
Aperiatur Terra, Et Germinet
Atazoth
Esmund was early for the rendezvous, in the hour before dusk, and
spent a cautious hour scouting out the area. He had parked his
vehicle down a secluded track near the foot of the hill, taking
only his rucksack, his revolver with spare ammunition, the Glock
pistol, and a hand-grenade, before bobby-trapping the vehicle with
his remaining grenade.
Satisfied with his reconnaissance, he settled down to wait by a
spreading but wind-twisted Hawthorn bush, a good distance away from
the hill's ancient fortified summit. There was the crescent Moon
above the western horizon, and then stars in the clear darkening
sky, and he continued to wait in the cold darkness for what seemed,
and what was, a long time, before stretching himself and moving
forward a little distance. They were, by now, many hours late, and
he was deciding how much longer he would wait when he sensed
someone behind him, and spun round, revolver raised, and ready.
Nothing; no one; no sound. And so he returned to his cautious
waiting vigil until he saw something, some shape, fastly coming
toward him from the summit of the hill. The shape was tawny
white-ish and as it got nearer Esmund saw it was an Owl. There was
no sound, just that bird of prey coming straight toward him and
looking straight at him. He was surprised by its size, its
wing-span, and it was within only three feet of him, its talons
extended as if to land on his head, when he instinctively ducked down
and it veered
away to his left. When, only
seconds later, he looked again it was gone, down - he assumed -
into the copse of trees that clung to the lower slopes of the hill.
Then she was standing beside him, and he rose to his feet without
fear. She kissed him, then, and pressed her body into his, her
tongue caressing his, and her hand stroking his face.
"We are alone and no harm can come to you here," her melodious
voice said as unspoken words within his head, and she gave him a
vision of her past hour and more.
Of how she had gently painlessly given birth while Raynould
watched. Of how he had taken the human-looking girl-child to a
place she had provided for him where his role would be to care for
that child as he would care for the other such children born that
night and in the few days to all those women - except Sandra - who
were seeded. Of how those children had grown quickly in their
adopted wombs and how they would, as children, also quickly grow
over the next few years until they were ready enough to go forth
into the world, each one a nexion waiting to open, to be physically
seeded, and to seed in their various and magickal ways those
powerful acausal energies which would, in causal-time, break down
the barriers of The Others and steadily weaken through many causal
presencings the causal that now held so many humans in thrall. Thus
would her children gather the allies they needed, in secret at
first; thus would they begin the great change that would break-down
the very causal order itself; and thus would they breed a new and
more evolved race, a new species to seed themselves among the very
stars.
There would be those who feared this; those who hated her children
and her allies. Those prepared to fight until the last drop of
human blood. Those hate-filled ones who would strive to find, to
ruthlessly hunt, down her children and their children's children,
just as they had found Sandra whom Esmund had seeded: the Sandra
whom she changed with her acausal and shapeshifting arts after he,
magically adept, had called to her, longed for her, one night
having felt her presence, her return to Earth. So had he touched
her essence, and so she found him, came unto him, while he lay
asleep in Sandra's arms, and so did she change that life that only
a few causal moments earlier he and Sandra had brought forth into
causal-being.
"But you have proved yourself, to me," her melodious voice said as
unspoken words within his head, "and you henceforth are my
companion and only with you will I henceforth share this my
physical form."
So she kissed him again, and he saw as if in replay his escape from
his - from her - cottage, and felt again his one jealous moment, as
he saw Sandra's death and Zarid being bound, tied, hooded, and
injected. But he, Esmund Yaxley, was human - all-too-human, perhaps
- and he surrended his body and his love to her, there, on the dark
night while a crescent moon descended, as Sirius did, into that
almost-Winter's starry sky.
He awoke to find himself naked under a warm duvet in a bright room
of large windows which showed, below, a cityscape under a clear
blue sky of an English Winter. For a moment, he felt disorientated,
as if both Time and Space had somehow slipped or been distorted
and, after looking out of one of the windows which, except for a
door, almost seamlessly surrounded the room, he lay down again on
the large bed.
He slept then, and dreamed - of the past, a present and a future -
and awoke to find himself hot, as the city below basked in the
warmth of early Summer. He understood then, in that moment, and was
not surprised when she, suddenly, was there beside him, incarnate
again, naked in
the bed, pressing her body into his and kissing him as they made
sensuous love in that, his, city-penthouse. There was, he knew, on
a floor below, a child, a female child, growing, nurtured by his
lover's breast milk and cared for by her sibling Nanny, as there
was, in the city, many deeds of hate and violence while they, the
lovers, loved as they loved, entwined within each other's body and
each other's being, just as there was, suddenly and for him, no
distinction between Time, place and Space: no him, or her; only a
being which lived as it, they, as Them, The Dark Gods, lived:
within the acausal Times and Spaces. He was alive, then, joyful,
ecstatic, breeding with her, in her, the nexions that were needed;
alive, joyful, ecstatic, while Zarid - his knowledge a danger to
his captors - was languishing, drugged, in some enclosing
psychiatric cell, and Sandra his former lover lay dead, her body
and her foetus clinically, methodically, dissected.
Thus did they, her - his - enemies, still seek him with a lustful
hate and need, and thus did she - his new lover, mistress - protect
him as only she could protect him, and thus did he, when he awoke,
feel again the pain of his new lover's absence.
So he dressed in one of his many expensive hand-made suits to
linger awhile on a floor below with his three young daughters while
they played as precocious children played, and their protecting
shapeshifting Nanny waited, silent, smiling, watchful, in a corner
of that plush room. Soon, they his daughters would venture forth,
each to a life, a world, a task, of their own - as he would return
to this building to seed her again as the acausal seeped ever more
deeply in the causal world he once knew and loved.
He knew, then, as he walked out that particular time-slipping
morning into the busy street of that capital city under the warm
Sun of an English Summer, that Raynould had been found, caught,
tortured, and killed, and his - her - daughter captured. So he was
not surprised to find her, his lover, walking beside him as he
walked among the bustling hordes of city-dwelling human beings.
There was a human pain, an anguish, in her, which he felt, and he
held her hand as they walked along that street where several men,
and women, stared, to stop, to look at her, awed by her beauty, her
being, her scent. Then, suddenly, he was with her in a bright
forensic room where her first-born daughter lay, stretched out and
naked and restrained, but alive, on an operating table while men in
white gowns and masks stood around and two men in suits stood by a
door in one corner.
They, the men in gowns, were cutting the young woman, her daughter
of child-bearing age, and she bled, as a human would - as another
scalpel was raised, a probe extended to reach into her body. Her
daughter turned, then, and smiled - aware of her mother's presence
- but the humans saw only Esmund who, angry, snatched the scalpel
to slash wildly at throats, faces. The two men in suits came toward
him, one - Malin - brandishing a gun, but Esmund was too quick for
them as he raged toward them to knock them to the ground, and the
carnage - his berserker carnage - was soon over, even as an alarm
sounded, the last gesture of one human scientist now lying
dead.
Then Esmund, his lover and her daughter were gone from that
particular and causal Time and Space, to leave only questions: only
more unanswered perplexing questions for Malin and his ilk.
7:
Agios Ischyros Baphomet
They - Esmund, his lover and her daughter - rejoiced, and he was
with them for what to him seemed a very long time in a place within
acausal Time and Space. But it was only a few heartbeats of his
dense causal Earth-bound life that passed while he languished in a
beautiful blissful timeless eternity where his knowing, his
feeling, stretched, or seemed to stretch, from one end of his
Earth-containing Galaxy to the other, and where he was, in that
singular acausal instant, all life, all living, all
beings-coming-into-being, all the living life given and giving
birth.
Then he, changed in some way he did not then understand, was back
in his, in her, bed, in that bright city penthouse, while her naked
and already healed daughter kissed him and he entered her, taking
her human virginity, as her mother lay beside them, touching him,
one lover to another. He had never known such bliss, such love,
such existence, before in his own brief causal existence, and he
lingered within her, this young woman, even as his seed seeded her
womb which would bring forth a new kind of life. Agios Ischyros Baphomet, Agios Ischyros Baphomet he, his
very
being, intoned.
Causal Space and causal Time slipped again, as he knew they must -
and he was sitting outside his modest mud-brick dwelling in the
shade of a Palm tree dressed in a galabiyyah while, nearby, the
younger of his two new
young half-Nubian daughters played amid the desert sand and one of his
two female domestic helpers carried a large pot to bring back water
from the
nearby artesian well. His afternoon would be filled with duties, as he
instructed his two young male students in the ancient skills and
arts of esoteric acausal magick, and - despite his satisfaction with
such duties and his role - he still missed his former brief enchanted
life in England. It was but a necessary stage - and part of him,
most of him, had desired to return with her to her acausal spaces
even as her daughter gave birth to their first child. But he
stayed, for he was not yet ready or able of his own free will to
forever pass beyond, to exist beyond, the causal; stayed, while she
herself returned as she the primal nexion had to return to become
the strange life-force burgeoning within them all. Stayed, for he
would be, as he now was, the beginning of that hidden reclusive
Order which would, when the causal Time was right, emerge as the
Old Order faded, crumbled, and died, aided and partly caused by
those others of the new half-human symbiotic race who now dwelt
with their growing number of children, and human helpers and
allies, on every continent on Earth.
Already the presence of this new acausal centre, this spreading
nexion, was felt, as her daughter - now his wife, and Nubian - achieved
a local, and for the moment, clandestine
following, there on the fringes of that desert. Such beauty; such
wordless power. Men, women, loved, obeyed her - and
she had only to think a thought for them to strive to make it real
just as each one of them would willingly, gladly, give their life for
her, knowing the blissful acausal life which would await them. Thus
it was as it had been, there, once before - and as it would be again,
on
another
planet in another causal Time and Space.
Soon, he would as foretold retreat into his own world of reclusive
and secret desert-dwelling teaching to leave her majestic, ageless
with her ageless daughters as their influence spread, as it would
spread until her, their, causal Earth-bound tasks were achieved.
But, for now, he was happy to prepare her way: she who would open,
be, the new nexion to presence the acausal fully upon the Earth,
bringing thus that futuristic culture, that star-travelling,
star-dwelling, culture that many humans had dreamt about, beginning
as such a culture was of new explorations into the very acausal
itself, explorations which could, which would then in that future
causal-time - as it would for Esmund and all of his esoteric kind
now when they had achieved their Earthly goal - lead them toward
and into the next stage of their journey of evolution.
"You know," Malin said as Zarid lay, in his windowless cell,
half-stupefied by the drugs forced into him, "and considering your
ancestry you should know, you had it the wrong way round; inverted.
We're the good guys."
"Are you? Are you really?" Zarid managed to say. "But you didn't have
to kill her or her unborn child, did you?"
But Malin only smiled and left to let three men enter. They did
their work quickly, quietly, efficiently, and Zarid was soon dead,
only one more casualty of a war that had already begun.
Algar Merridge
Year of Fayen 118
Note: This
brief MS, written by an Adept, and entitled In The Sky of Dreaming, is
published, in full, here for the first-time. Like
The Deofel Quartet it is an
instructional text written in a non-conventional fictional form. One of
its purposes
is to outline the reality of The Dark Gods, a reality somewhat
obscured by the literary mystifications and misapprehensions of
Lovecraft and others.